I will not censor part of me,
Which begs to be expressed,
Because it shatters the illusion,
And reveals the human mess.
There is no way around it,
Only the wading through,
Up to my neck in all of it,
Is all I know to do.
Perhaps I’ll sit a moment,
Just be with the stink and then,
Investigate bacteria,
‘Till I get up and move again.
I see all of you around me,
Also trying to make sense,
I can’t look away and decorate,
Or try to cover up the stench.
I do not mind the stopping still,
To have a look around,
Being with the shit that bubbles up,
Is the only way I’ve found.
To engage this life and all of it,
As it presents itself to me,
I’ll just use it as fertilizer,
Composting crap creatively.
–A.R.
Woman at Mud Volcano 2 by Natasha Prosenc
Because sometimes people wonder why I write about “certain things” that perhaps they think should stay private. My answer, because it happened, because it comes up, because it is part of life, because staying silent about any of it simply causes isolation. Isolation for myself and for others who have a similar experience. I have been silent at the wrong times, about the wrong things, for too long. Silence for me will stay “on the cushion” and that is it.
Posted in Abuse, Family, Friendship, Humanity, Identity, Meditation, Poetry
Tags: Life, meditation, Memory, National Poetry Month, poetry, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Speaking, truth, Writing
sometimesihatemycat 